Two more weeks and Lucifer will return to Netflix. That actually made me think about our desires and the eternal unanswered question – what do women want? Many men say that women don’t know what they want. Interesting but did you ever try to rephrase the question? Maybe we don’t know what we want but we definitely know what we don’t want, what we need and what we desire. Hence a short guide for Guys from my perspective on women’s needs and desires.
Stop finding excuses and just do it
Noticed that men are masters at finding excuses for not doing stuff, mostly house work. Real life example,
– Hun can you please bring out the garbage?
– Yes, in a second
ONE HOUR LATER
– Hun again, bring out the garbage
– Yes, yes, I said that I’ll do it
TWO HOURS LATER
– Bring out the damn garbage!
– I said that I’ll do it, stop yelling at me
Sounds familiar? Guess so. Guys if we ask you to do something it’s because firstly we are organised and have a cleaning schedule – cleaning first, get it done and focus on fun stuff. Secondly, despite most of us Ladies love cleaning and it’s nice to live in a clean apartment it doesn’t mean we have to do everything ourselves, because we are not all in one: cleaners, cooks, maids, care givers, baby sitters and managing the household is not only our responsibility it’s yours too. Thirdly, when we ask for your help in cleaning, do it properly! Taking a wet cloth without detergent and pretending that you are cleaning the bathroom sinks, makes us furious as doing things half way means we have to do it again ourselves, so what’s the point of your so called help? And lastly… if you don’t help out appreciate our effort and have a little respect for it by not making the apartment dirty 5 min after it’s been cleaned. Makes sense right?
Don’t ask stupid questions
If you think you are showing attention by asking stuff like: where are you going, do you have to drink with your girlfriends again, when will you be back, do you have to go to the hairdresser, oh you really were at the hairdresser, didn’t notice any change, you bought new shoes/clothes/cosmetics again,
where will you store it, there is no place in the draw anymore… The simple answer to all of the above is YES because new shoes, drinking with girlfriends and going to the hairdresser makes us happy and feel good.
If you are keen to show your attention and care, do it differently, like make us our favourite coffee in the morning or say that after the hairdresser or beauty appointment we look absolutely stunning. We don’t expect flowers every day or cheesy romantic comedy like situations, small things like putting your dirty socks and undies in the laundry basket is truly enough. Again, real life example. My friend invited me over for a coffee. We took the mugs filled with black, awesome smelling goodness and went to the garden… there they were… socks lying on the barbeque. My friend’s partner just left them there.
There is a little femme fatale in each of us, so we need and desire fireworks. The most difficult part of each relation is to maintain the spark, the fire and passion. Difficult but not impossible. In the beginning it is easy, coz for most of the time you and your partner don’t leave the bedroom, like two junkies constantly wanting more but as years pass you get used to each other. Now, how does it look from a woman’s perspective when time goes by?
When we don’t feel your passion, interest, when you look at us only as the housewife, mother or the woman that will stay regardless how fat, boring or careless you get, despite the feelings we still might have for you, at some point we will come to our senses where reason and logic takes over. Then we stop bothering and leave to find somebody who can give us that what we deeply, secretly and truly desire… proper, hot, steaming sex like Chinese New Year’s fireworks and not some miserable sparklers. How to get to that? Look at the point below.
As simple as it might sound, we need you to listen, process, understand and remember what we say and not pretend you are listening with your thoughts floating somewhere around last evening’s football game. There is nothing wrong to ask additional questions if something is unclear but for heaven’s sake pay attention and remember. Yes, OK fine, realise that we women sometimes talk too much but the reason for it is that we try to explain the same matter in different ways or we have to explain the same matter multiple times for you to finally get it… which in most cases you don’t get anyway. So please do us a favour and listen actively.
Be a knight not a squire
Women nowadays are not only princesses anymore, we transformed into being princess knights. We are independent, know how to take care of ourselves, have our passions and life expectations. Hence we don’t need a squire to look after, we need a knight.
Somebody who will be our equal to share passions with, somebody who would inspire and encourage us, somebody who won’t complain about everything and everyone but most of all somebody who won’t constantly be asking us the question we all hate – hun do you know where my socks are?
What do I truly desire? Hmmmm free dive gear and travel for the rest of my life. Although now, I wouldn’t complain about Tom Ellis in sexy undies standing in my kitchen with two glasses of prosecco.